Solve your problems yourself

Everyone wants to be successful. Some take this idea very superficially, but others like me search for more depth in it. And since every success is planned, you need a system for yourself to indicate if you are on the right track to the goal you wish to achieve. But because it can be very hard for someone to observe himself, there is another good indicator you can use to get this job done - women. Their intuition is of good use to them when it comes to things like this. Evolution tuned them perfectly to sense someone’s internal problems which in great amounts couldn’t provide security needed for their survival. And since your internal world expresses in your outer world, it isn’t even that hard to tell when you aren’t at ease with yourself. You simply aren’t attractive. Who would like to take over some extra problems someone couldn’t have solved for himself? You can’t blame them then.
So what can we learn from this? You need to learn how to amuse yourself. You have to become as independent as you can. With all areas of your life. Never expect someone to solve your problems instead of yourself. That way, there will be always someone in the relationship depending from the other. And I don’t believe that would be a healthy relationship. I want it to be of “equal powers”.
I think I made the same mistake with the girl I wrote about in the previous post. I practically don’t let myself to take any time off, to just relax and slowdown myself. I have always thought this would come with the relationship I would get myself into, since I enjoy feminines company so much and it feels so relaxing to me. But that would be quite a burden for her, don’t you think. And I think it even made me to pushy, to needy and unfortunately I have repelled her. So it’s vital for me to solve this as I don’t want to miss such a good girl ever again. Any recommendations? How do you relax?